Woe is Me

I feel like crap today. I have massive sinuses and they’re infected. You know what the say about a guy with big sinuses . . . when he gets a sinus infection it hurts like a mother.

Yesterday I bought a new alarm clock because the left bottom half of the numbers on my old one were no longer showing. I woke up at 71:78pm one day and freaked out; “Holy geez, I’m nearly 64 hours late for work. Today I woke up around 4:00am to the sound of beep-beep-beep-beep . . . beep-beep-beep-beep. This pissed me off for two reasons. First, I had set the alarm for 5:45am and second, I like to wake up to music. I tried to shut off the alarm, turn-off the power, flip the switch from music to beep and back again, turn the volume down, press snooze, none of these worked. My hearing in my right ear is almost non-existent, usually this is a bit of an inconvenience but in this case I was quite happy to turn over, sleep on my left ear, and block out the sound. Eventually though I had to turn back over and the beeping continued. I couldn’t find the source of the sound. I pressed my good ear to the clock and the sound got lower. A normal person would take this as a sign that the beeping was not coming from the clock. I took it as a sign that my clock had a personality and was jerking me around. It turns out that the beeping was coming from my old clock that I had unplugged but left in the bedroom. There were batteries in the old clock that retain the time if there was a power outage. These batteries were on their last legs and rather than just dying a peaceful death decided to take Dylan Thomas’s advice and not go gentle into that goodnight. So now my face aches due to the sinuses and I’m tired.