Friday evening I received a phone call at around 10pm from a "private number". I normally don't answer these but, what the heck.
"Hello"
"Is this FCB?" in a voice that sounded like the woman's hobbies included eating ground glass and gargling gin, not to mention chain smoking unfiltered Marlboros since she was seven.
"Yes"
"FCB?"
"Yes."
"Well this is Ethel Flavenstock and I want to know if you're still handsome."
"Yes."
Handsome is a subjective term.
The conversation continued.
"I've got Yvonne Gruber here and she wants to talk to you."
"I don't think I know either of you but sure, put her on."
"Oh, maybe we've got the wrong FCB."
"Au contraire my friend, you have the right FCB."
They both giggled, which led to a coughing fit and I think Yvonne passed out but it may have been Ethel. I then hung up the phone and dreamed sweet dreams for the night.
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